Not Easy

Hye.

I have always planned to fully breastfeed my baby. Mainly because 'they' say breastfeeding makes you lose weight, fast. I only had that in mind (at that point of time). Yes. Losing the weight I have successfully gained during my pregnancy. Spare me the cynical look, I put on 23 freaking kgs! That's almost the weight of a 3-year-old toddler. I have only managed to lose half of them to date.

Anyway, when my baby was born and in need of milk, I was dehydrated and dry. I had chapped lips and my nipples cracked way before my baby even had the chance to latch on. Why you might ask. Try being in labour for 12 straight hours and you'll know. But I was determined to exclusively breastfeed him. So, I let him latch. And boy did he latch. I was in so much pain that I cried while breastfeeding my baby. He was sucking so hard, I really couldn't stand the pain that I had to turn to my breast pump for help. To make matters worse, I was not producing a lot of milk the first few days. My supply came only on the 4th day.

Although it doesn't seem like it took too long before I was engorged, but believe me when I say it was probably the longest 4 days I have ever been through. I almost gave up. I was this close to giving him formula milk. Thank God for my Darling who was so supportive at that time. The nurses weren't so helpful actually. Perhaps because my baby was crying (sebab tak cukup susu) and disturbing the other babies. There was this one time the nurse wheeled him in my room (about 10 minutes after wheeling him out) looking all irritated and saying, “Ayo, cannot la. Crying non-stop.” He probably woke every single baby when he was wailing. Hehe.

Today, 2 months later, alhamdulillah, I am still exclusively breastfeeding my baby. :) I am not condemning mothers who gave their babies formula milk. I totally understand why most of them succumb to it. It hurts. When you're not producing much, and the baby is sucking hard because he is hungry, it hurts like hell. When your baby refuses to stop crying because he is not getting enough, it hurts even more. So, just do what you can. Buat setakat mampu sudah la. Jangan paksa diri. Orang nak cakap apa, cakap la. They probably don't know much. Honestly, breastfeeding my baby has taught me a lot of things. And I am so grateful that I am able to do it despite the hiccups (will probably blog about it later).

All I want to really say here is that breastfeeding is not easy and it doesn't really help you lose weight! At least not for me. :p

Bye.

Not So Flat

Hye.


This is my baby boy, Aryan. He is now a little over 2 months old tapi dah sibuk nak pegang botol susu sendiri. Busy body kan? Wonder where he got that trait from. Haha! OK dah lari topik. I obviously just gave birth not too long ago. So why is my Darling putting his hands on my (now not so flat) tummy while asking 'Bila nak ada baby lagi?' *pengsan*

Boleh tak bagi aku kurus dulu? *cry* Bila la nak muat jeans size 25 aku ni? Will I ever succeed? Dah. Tak payah jawab. Malas nak fikir. (for now, as usual)

Bye.

VPL

Hye.

I have always always hated VPL (sila google). It's gross OK. The whole world doesn't need to know that you have your panty on. Let alone what kind, colour etc. I never thought of it as sexy. Disgusting is more like it. What is so sexy about your panties cutting into your butt cheek? Let's not even discuss the fact that it is riding up your ass visibly. Doesn't it just say that your panty is a tad too small (or big), idiot? Eh kenapa aku emo? Sebab nya ialah, seluar aku semua dah ketat sekarang dan secara automatik, aku telah menjadi orang yg mempunyai VPL. Benci!

sexy ke ni? *pic googled*

p/s : Untuk yang malas nak google :
A visible panty line is the situation when the outline of a person's underwear is visible through the clothing. The underpants may be seen as a ridge or depression in the clothes, or as a result of the clothing material being sufficiently transparent. *source wikipedia*

Bye.

My Precious

Hye.

I am back. Please don't ask me for how long. I don't know, really. So OK, since my last post (which was posted from the labour room), a lot has happened. And I really mean a lot. I am officially a mother. Alhamdulillah. Thanks for all your prayers.

So motherhood has been anything but easy. I now know and understand why married couples take time before they have kids. Your life (above everything else) changes once you have kids. I used to secretly sneer at people who say they aren't ready to have children. I would like to apologize to these people I quietly disrespected. Pls accept my sincerest apology.

You see, before I met my Darling (and got married), I have always feared that I would have fertility issues. Seriously. My worst fear (at that point of time) was not being able to give my husband healthy offsprings. So when we were done with the whole wedding thing, we sat down and lightly discussed about having a baby. I really wanted to try soon as I wanted to have ample time to fix 'things' if they were found to be broken. Hehe. My Darling wasn't to keen at first but when I explained why, he kind of agreed.

A month or so after that, I was pregnant. :) And slowly, reality started to sink in. I was beginning to doubt myself. Was I really ready for all there is to come? I never thought I would lose my waistline together with my sleeping time (haha!). Let alone being the one responsible to raise a child! Simply put, I wasn't really prepared to face motherhood at all. But alhamdulillah, now, things are so much better. I am slowly adapting. And it gives me such pride and joy when I look at my precious little one.

So lovely people, here's introducing my (now 2 months old) son, Aryan Dhia Firdaus. :)

Sound asleep..A few days before turning 2 months old

This was taken a day after arriving in good 'ol Bintulu :)

One look at my baby, and I forget that I have officially lost my waistline and my beauty sleep! For now thath is. :p

Bye.